I have recently developed an appreciation of the importance and beauty of ritual...I've had a number of teachers. Through the practice of meditation, the simple ritual of awareness on breathing in and breathing out, has brought me closer to a calm and quiet awareness of this present moment. My attempt at a daily sunrise two mile walk has been such a pleasant day starting ritual. My cat, Simcha, has quite a repertoire of rituals...and I see her take such joy in her daily "tasks" ...we have certain games we repeat, certain routines at bedtime and mealtime, and morning time. And I have been gradually getting better at reading/praying the evening prayer from the Book of Common Prayer (with the help of this website): http://dailyoffice.wordpress.com The liturgy of the Anglican (Episcopal) church has become more and more meaningful, the Eucharist, the singing of the psalms...rituals down through the centuries and across the world that have enriched lives.
Of course...my OCD tendencies may play a role in my gravitating toward ritual, so I can see the downside (daily checking stock prices, retirement accounts, counting the number of clients I have seen each month, even ritualizing my breakfast (eating Oatmeal from Thanksgiving to Easter...cold cereal from Easter to Thanksgiving...and a bagel every Saturday (and sometimes Sunday)... Rituals have been distracting and silly, as well, in my life, and have robbed me of some of the joy of living in this moment, and seeing the newness and freshness of each day.
I heard Ted Kooser give a talk..."How poetry saved my life" He talked about being diagnosed and treated for cancer, I believe of the larynx or somewhere in his throat area, and during the chaos of his treatment, he developed a ritual of a morning walk followed by writing one poem about something he observed on his walk. By bringing order to one small area of his life, he gradually brought order out of chaos in the rest of his life. This stuck with me.
I will strive to keep a sense of healthy ritual alive in the days and weeks ahead.
Tomorrow morning....my PET scan...
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At this morning's midweek Eucharist and Healing service, I asked for God's Healing for you as well as a friend I've cherished for over 35 years, an 82-year-old retired Episcopal priest suffering from a rare cancer. Don't worry, my selfishness isn't completely obliterated... I put my name on a Prayer Card! But continue my prayers for you, here in our cross-blogging waves of Godly holding. As well I strongly suspect that we are missing 2nd cousins, as the more you share about what you've done and how you are, the more I nod vigorously.
ReplyDeleteWaiting for test results has been for me one of the more WRETCHED parts of dealing with life-threatening gunk. Waiting... wondering... then trying to take it all in as some over-caffeinated scientist breezes through terminology while your solar plexus squeezes the breath out of you. Perhaps you're more centered than I am, OCD confessions and all (how I related!). I hope that your family, your wife, your step kids, your grandkids, your friends, mystery blogging prayer friends such as myself.... I hope we're all HERE for you today and each step of this way.
Your spiritual history mirrors mine, except I came again into Christ's arms 12 years ago and not your twenty-five. I'm "half-Jewish"; my father David was a White Russian Jew. I spent a quarter century in various 'new age' pursuits. Christ's Mercy fills my heart with awe and delight.
Bless you, fellow path-walker... and may you be truly HELD today.
Diane
ReplyDeleteBless you, cousin! My heritage has Russian Jewish blood as well. ...and we have probably crossed a few aural, new age, Ram Dass lovin, chakra, chanting, mind expanding byways along the way!!! all the while He patiently waited, and then ran to greet us in a loving embrace when we decided to return home. Aint it something!!!
thank you so much for your prayers, and I lift you to the Father, the Alpha and Omega...who was and is and is to come...before all this disease, and during all this disease and after all this disease, the One who will ultimately heal us completely.