10. I scheduled a routine annual physical three months ahead of my normal October trek for a physical.
9. My G.P. felt a lump in my neck that I had not myself noticed.
8. My brother in law, Tim, internationally noted ENT at the University of Wisconsin happened to be in Lincoln that very week, (caring for his own sister, Susan, who was herself fighting a brave, but ultimately losing battle with ovarian cancer), and was able to help walk me through the CT scan, biopsy results, etc. and explain what was being discovered in a language I could understand.
7. That said brother-in-law has graciously continued to help coordinate care and treatment.
6. That 3 months before diagnosis, I stumbled upon a blog quite totally randomly ( here is the link...check it out...)
http://hoperenewing.blogspot.com
and I was touched by the courage, honesty, and humor of Diane as she battled with acute myeloid leukemia (AML) and I had the thought, "if I ever have to deal with cancer, I will remember to make every effort to do it as graciously, and a blog might be one way, in fact, to help process such a journey.
5. That a year or so ago, I went to the local hospital to hear former poet laureate of the US, Ted Kooser, give a talk "how poetry saved my life" and discuss his journey with oral cancer. That talk stuck in my head...as is evident from the direction of some of the previous posts...who knows, maybe someday I will post one of my own poems...if I can talk about my underwear trauma at age 5, I might yet get the courage to post a poem.
4. That I have family and so many more friends than I realized, who care and are praying for me and offering their care and support.
3. That my cancer is treatable, and prognosis good.
2. Kathy...my strong and loving and brave wife, who is at my side through this journey.
1. GOD...who, in His mercy, should even be mindful of this little worm, and in His infinite love and compassion, has made it abundantly clear to me that He will walk beside me in whatever moments or days of darkness lie ahead.
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I am more wordless than you might expect at the continuing revelations of your soul's beauty, poetry and connection with God's amazing abundance. As for the medical details - well, they bring up my own painful memories. I ain't no help there unless you desire a co-cringer. It sounds as though however that you have a little angel who has walked this walk before ye. I pray that your experience of abundance grows.... what a ride!
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to say about what is to come...but two thoughts come to mind, "Let's sit"...and "This too shall pass". I talked with my friend, Jenn, today about your treatment plan. She knows two people who have had throat cancer and they went through a treatment where they need a feeding tube like you will be getting. And they are both ALIVE today!! Thanks again for your lovely writing. It's been a blessing to me. Jodi
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