checking in - more about yesterday

I am not yet ready to go back to writing of deeper things, though it's where I want always to live; I can't seem to find my way there today, so, I am checking in again...

One observation about yesterday, and then a revealing interview...when I arrived to check in to the hospital, I was informed Dr. Ward would be doing the surgery. As I lay waiting on the hospital bed after the IV was inserted, antibiotic and saline solution flowing within, I had this image...I was Beaver Cleaver, and I was waiting for Ward Cleaver to come and make everything OK...soon Wally would walk in and rustle my hair and exclaim...gee beave, you really did it this time! There was some comfort in thinking Dr. Ward would be this kindly father figure. Then, I was brought to another room to wait for the arrival of the Dr...45 minutes late, (but who's counting?)...no big deal, and the nurse was kind enough to tell me his previous surgery was running over due to unanticipated complications. Oh, thank you for sharing... well, in walks Dr. Ward...and I'll be... if he is not the spitting image of a grown up Eddie Haskell. Hey, who cares...thank you Dr. Ward, for taking such good care of me.

Now, on to the interview...

INTERVIEWER: Can you tell us, Steve, how much bland food (chicken a la king, over mashed potatoes, not biscuits, thank you Kathy, it was delicious!) one should eat following the insertion earlier in the day of a garden hose into your stomach?

STEVE: Excellent question! Yes, in fact, I can tell you precisely...one should eat exactly one-half of the amount I snarfed down last evening.

INTERVIEWER: So, Steve, what happens when you eat twice as much as you should following stomach surgery?

STEVE: Again, a good question...I am happy to answer, with a simple demonstration. Observe...I am holding in my hand one regulation U.S. Army Combat Boot. Now, I am putting it on my foot. Now would you please step back two steps so I can implant this in your gut?

INTERVIEWER: I understand... let's move on to another question... Dr. Blum, I have heard that Sigmund Freud, dying of cancer of the jaw, forewent any pain medication because he felt so dedicated to his work that he did not want to chance dulling his concentration or have anything interfere with his writing of his insights and theory. Have you had similar thoughts regarding your work?

STEVE: (checking his watch) hmmmm 30 minutes early...(but who's counting?) Excuse me, could you pass me that cup of water? Now, what was that question?

INTERVIEWER: It is well known you have suffered since early childhood with periodic insomnia...(thank you Tim Tyler, wherever you roam). Have your meds allowed you to get past the discomfort of that Home Depot deluxe, triple-ply beauty, and get any rest last night?

STEVE: You must understand, Bill...we who journey to the land of Versed, and travel home down the path of Oxycodone, Ambien, Lorazepam, all the while liberally snacking on extra strength Tylenol live in a region known as the Twilight Zone; we are neither asleep nor awake...did I just mention the Twilight Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz?

INTERVIEWER: It's Chad...Dr. Blum, I see you have scheduled yourself to see six clients today. Don't you find that irresponsible, or at least a little questionable, given your present Mental Status?

STEVE: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzyouseemdisappointedandhurt, Bob.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzz,

INTERVIEWER: My name is Chad

STEVE: Right....please, continue Rob, you were discusszzzzzzzzzzzzzzzing your feelings?

INTERVIEWER: Thank you Dr. Blum, you've been quite informative, but I am afraid we are out of time........ Do you have any final thoughts to share with our readers?

STEVE: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz